Paranoid !!!

I was so upset yesterday night...tears actually drop down but i control it back...
Actually i mean to say put on a shirt coz there is another outsider around in the
house , that's my sis in law new maid...
to me is a respect and also how you carry yourself...
but of coz end up we dont agree with each other coz as usual
his big eyes and hurting words and yes he say i am paranoid...
ok ..if you say so ...and even turn my words around...
that's is the thing that i can't take it...
nowadays he talk to me also without respect...very sad .
and everything i say he will not agree with me.
it become like i am the odd one out...
deep inside i felt very upset.
but i decided to just leave it...
why should i force a person who don even know how to gain people respect..
why should i make my own life difficult..
come to think of it , i got nothing to lost...
it he who dont know how to treasure the family life...
it's his lost.
he who lost his way , will forever lost his way if he doesn't want to find the right path ....

ok something to be happy about...
our new office is almost ready and yes me and my boss went to ikea to buy
the book shelf , tables etc...
so far we are quite happy to be in this company...we would have proven ourselve if not for the H1N1 case...our sales would have increase...
no choice, just got to see how it goes...
and yes M has bought me my hp pointer , and would be bringing it to me by this week.

swimming...

this noon had a date with M ..at his condo ...
he ask me to bring boy there for a swim
and very lucky , today weather very good..
and of coz boy had a great time...
at first he scream like nobody business coz he is very scare.
then M let him gain trust and then boy finally swim with M holding him.
Seeing them having a great time , i am really very happy too!
The pic of seeing the boy enjoying our company is just very beautiful!
and i really thank you M for giving boy such a wonderful time.

Back at home , boy cousin came ...
they like to play with each other but everytime shortly after that this cousin
of his will always throw temper at him ...and everytime bully him etc...
i think i am not a very good mother... i cant protect him and always ask him to
give in to the cousin...even if the cousin is in the wrong.
sign !!! what to do , i can got the right to teacher my son so how can i teacher other people kid ...
that why my boy become so " soft" like me!
I am so sorry my boy ...

swine flu !

Indeed...this has been a very big problem for me...
in total already 4 trips been cancelled...
heart pain...because me and my boss put in so much effort.
what to do ...things happen for a reason.
although no more confirm trip for me to go but i still believe god closed a door
on us but he will open another door for us....
of coz when i get to know group being cancel even to aust , taiwan , seoul etc..
at first really cannot get over it...because we are just about to hand in out
a very good report book on our dept but then this thing happen ...
although in our country there is no confirm cases just yet but it's only
right for our govt to be very on the ball...
that night i went for my sauna...after that i feel really good...
and the next day i am ready for battle again...
and i hope this swine flu will quicky go off..or else my industry will be in big trouble...
keep my finger cross...pray real hard and dont give out!!!

舞台剧

好久没看舞台剧了。

发现自己真的很爱看。。

还记得第一部是向云的雨季。直到现在我还深深的记得。

昨晚和M 一起看了，

天冷就回来。。。



看后感到心情很城重，关于情绪的处理，爱。。。

像小静，人鬼殊途 ，无奈。。。让阿乐开始自己的新生活。不舍的“让爱”。。。无奈。。。

Overall it a very good drama and no regrets in watching and I know M enjoy it too…

There is a poem in the drama…by Cummings…also very meaningful…



Anyone lived in a pretty how town


by E. E. Cummings


anyone lived in a pretty how town(with up so floating many bells down)
spring summer autumn winter
he sang his didn't he danced his did
Women and men(both little and small)cared for anyone not at all
they sowed their isn't they reaped their same
sun moon stars rain children guessed
(but only a fewand down they forgot as up they grew
autumn winter spring summer)
that noone loved him more by more when by now and tree by leaf
she laughed his joy she cried his grief
bird by snow and stir by still
anyone's any was all to her someones married their everyones
laughed their cryings and did their dance
(sleep wake hope and then)
they said their nevers they slept their dream stars rain sun moon
(and only the snow can begin to explain
how children are apt to forget to remember
with up so floating many bells down)
one day anyone died i guess(and noone stooped to kiss his face)
busy folk buried them side by side
little by little and was by was all by all and deep by deep
and more by more they dream their sleep
noone and anyone earth by april
wish by spirit and if by yes.
Women and men(both dong and ding)summer autumn winter spring
reaped their sowing and went their came
sun moon stars rain

I am ok...

Hi dear readers....
I am ok...busy with planning of move office...
got so many things to follow up like ordering a offical grand opening ribbon ball,
order water dispenser etc...and of coz also busy with daily work...
think i will have at least 2 official trip to make in the month of may and june.
and now infact i am leaving for star cruise tonight.
with my boy ...will update when i am back...
this trip is without him...
and i think i will enjoy.
bye for now ...

accept me for what i am...???

to me , i think it's kind of selfish to say that ...
esp when in a marriage ...
how can one person accept everything and the other party not changing to
any better to help to save the marriage...
instead just throw you this sentence ..." accept me for what i am"
then my answer is sorry i can't and i dont know how long more can i stand..
i just have to wait till the day when i totally give up and lose heart.
a person who would not even consider to change his habits like late night , drinking,
gamble etc for the family...is he worth after all ?
yes no one is prefect and not even me...but at least i am willing to change my temper
etc for my family . in fact through out all these years...i have change alot...
lately my mum even tell me very seriousely that if one day i choose to end my marriage she will give me all her support...
i am not sure why she say that , but i think "outsider" can tell lor...
how much effort in put in etc...
nothing serious actually happen ...it is just that this person is not willing to do alot of things for the family ...he just think too much for himself...
seeing him taking all the hardship , i too feel the heart pain but instead he mention
that i am a bad wife who always wish that he won't get rich...
come on , in this world who dont want money , who dont wan to get rich and stay comfortable , got maid and $ to give birth to more kids etc...
but i still believe in stable income , at least dont have heart attack for the family.
anyway it's just that he is still unable to have a mature thinking and chinese saying ...never see coffin , tear wouldn't drop but for him i can only say...
he is a person who see coffin also dont tears.
enough about him...
my boy is good and obey...his mouth is very very sweet...
and one thing i am so happy about...i am going to watch a drama at the drama centre theatre on the 28apr nite " if there's seasons...."
i love to watch chinese drama but always no ka kee to go together...
thanks m for accompany me ....
another thing is last week , a woman give up her seat to me in the MRT...
i nearly faint...so i decided to do something about it...
watch what i see and drink etc...
if i can cut down on my weight ...then i will post in about my diet plan.

Happier...

Went for a movie after work with my ex...
watch shopaholic..funny show for laugh...it was good esp after all the stress
at work for a week...
now we are friends and we still enjoy each others company...
it was nice to have a friend who concern ...
find out that he bought the same hp model with me...
before watching movie..we went for the 99 cents sushi...
surprise that we both only ate $19.00...cheap rite.
this year i think i will have lots of trip oversea...
it's something good esp for my career...
i will treasure this chance.
and everyone esp joreal mum...not to worry about me as i am actually happier then before..and do not feel any heart pain for me as i choose this path myself.
and till now i have never hurt anyone...coz to love someone is not easy and
to hurt someone is even more difficult.
if there is hurt in your heart , u will not live to be a happy person...
and yes , i still love everyone ....