my uncle...

sometimes i really wonder... why are we in this world ? and what are we
suppose to achieve ? and having achieved , we are not able to take everything with us
upon death ... it just makes me wonder...
went to visit my uncle at the hospital last week...
seeing him suffer , make everyone of us heartache...
but his will of power to live is very very strong...
to me , everything is fated ...just like when it's time to go i will have to go..
it's just fix by the god...
but at least , he has got his love ones all around him , to be there to comfort him.
and to be honest , i did not and have not address the "wife" as aunty ..from
the very beginning ... because in my heart , i have only one aunty who passed away
many many many years ago... not sure why when i was a little girl till now ,
i can't bring myself to call her .. it's only untill that day when i was in hospital ,i saw how she loves and care about my uncle and how she comfort him etc ,
tears drop ... suddenly out of the blue , i just call her aunty ...
i guess i am touched by her action... but at the same time after calling her
that , i was angry with myself for days ...
anyway this really has got no business of mine ...it's just a little
secret in my heart since young...(no one knows these secret..not even my mum)
how i saw my real aunty heart break to see the husband bring the woman back
and how they used to laugh and talk infront of her...
and how she drop tears infront of me when i was just a little girl...
i just cannot forgive , until now... but i guess today i have forgiven!
and surprisingly , i can still remember how aunty looks like ....

to my dearest aunty in heaven ...
although i called the other person aunty...but u are still my dearest aunty...
i have not forgotten you. i remember how you hang on to the family although it
hurts your heart...
and i did not told you before ...i love you!

p/s : wish i can write this in chinese because i can espress better.